The Agape Bloom
Dedicated To
Stephen Meikle "Stevie" (1971 ~ 2019)
Darrin Meikle "Baby Blue" (1974 ~ 1997)
"loving you, is worth the human pain of losing you"
*Disclaimer & Content Advisory
This book touches on tender themes — grief, mental health, trauma, and loss. Please read gently and pause if anything feels heavy.
The Agape Bloom is not a replacement for therapy, medication, or professional care, but a companion alongside them. I hold deep respect for medical science and psychology; therefore, I encourage you to lean into the support you need.
Still, we spend most of our time with ourselves — not with outside supports. We can be our greatest ally or our harshest enemy, and the quality of our existence is, ultimately, an inside job. That part is our responsibility.
The Agape Bloom is offered to help soften your suffering and sow seeds of possibility.
Above all, know this: you are not alone, and your bloom is awaiting your permission.
Dedicated To
Stephen Meikle “Stevie” (1971 ~ 2019)
Darrin Meikle “Baby Blue” (1974 ~ 1997)
And to my adult children Shannon, Daniel, Kelsey and Tre who understood too early in life that loving can hurt, trust can be broken, and deep loss is a reality. This has been 'our journey'. You are my seeds, planted within depleted soil, with 'Agape' as our guide - finding our way to full Bloom.
“Loving you, is worth the human pain of great loss.”
Welcome, new friend.
We may not have met in person, but if you have come across this book, I believe we were meant to connect.
This is not a textbook, nor a manual, and I am not a guru. I hold no degrees, no formal training, no shiny title to present as authority. What I carry is my lived experience: a long history of loss, overwhelm, disconnection, burnout, and the heavy belief that I was “too much, or not enough.” I suffered under the weight of false guilt, shame, and undiagnosed ADHD. For many of those years, I was drowning — barely keeping my head above water.
And yet, here I am: alive, present, free. Living proof that lasting transformation is possible despite years of suffering.
The knowledge I share within these pages comes from lived experience and insights passed down by wise teachers. These words are for anyone inflamed by life, overwhelmed by chaotic thinking, suffocating in cycles of depression, anxiety, or loss; for those who feel disconnected from themselves and from life itself — and who are ready to come home to peace.
The Agape Bloom is my contribution to that journey, and the fulfillment of a promise I made to my youngest brother, Darrin, the year he died by suicide in 1997. Twenty-eight years later, that promise now lives in your hands.
My brother Stevie, who also took his life in 2019, once said: “If people judge mental illness, that doesn’t make them stronger or superior. It just makes them lucky.”
He was right. Some people in life simply strike it lucky. For the rest of us, despair arrives like a thick, unrelenting cloud. In those moments, thoughts feel like iron bars — cold, rigid, permanent. The mind whispers accusations so cruel we would never speak them aloud to another, yet we believe them because they echo inside our own heads. They feel absolute.
The chatterbox of the mind grows louder, crueler, more convincing. It insists we are not enough, or too much, that life will always feel heavy. We follow its commands as if they were truth. No wonder suffering feels permanent. No wonder it begins to feel like home.
Neuroscience shows us why: repetitive thoughts — hopeful or despairing — carve grooves in the brain. Those of us who’ve lived inside the cycle don’t need scans to prove it. We know how thought can trap us in patterns that feel impossible to escape.
I devoted decades to personal growth. I “did the hard work.” And still, something was missing. The endless struggle — striving, crashing, gasping for air — became its own torment.
The Turning Point
My greatest shift in my healing journey was when I discovered Fiona Lukeis and her Relatable program. The principles she shared revealed a truth that had been there all along: I was never broken. I was never meant to live enslaved to my own thoughts.
This recognition broke the chains. It was not dramatic, but deeply personal — gentle, undemanding, utterly transformative. It was the moment of coming home to myself. What I had believed about myself was never truth — only a story my mind kept telling.
And stories can change.
I Was Ready
When I came across Fiona’s work, I was exhausted. Tired of excuses, tired of the automatic patterns sabotaging my life. I had tried countless modalities. Each brought temporary hope, a greater knowledge and new tools to manage symptoms and patterns, but never the permanent change I longed for.
What set me free was different: no reliving of trauma, no digging up the past, no endless analysis. It was a fresh, simple insight — a clarity that bypassed the clutter of the mind and landed in something deeper.
Lasting transformation requires this. Not more knowledge, but insight. Something remembered in the heart, not just understood in the head.
A Missed Opportunity
Ironically, I had encountered a similar teaching in my late twenties. At the time, I was diving into therapy and self-help books. I remember attending a meeting led by a teacher whose message was blunt, almost cold. I felt his delivery lacked compassion, and I rejected it outright.
Looking back, I see the truth: we cannot welcome new understanding while clinging tightly to old beliefs. Time has taught me that belief is not fixed — it bends, it expands, it makes space for truth when we are ready.
I spent twenty-five more years trapped in debilitating spirals before I finally heard wisdom clearly again — and this time, I was ready.
I don’t want that long road for you. My hope is that you open, even gently, to the possibility of freedom now.
A Different Way
This book does not ask you to peel back endless layers, revisit trauma, or fight your “shadow.” While those paths may serve some, this is a different way: fresh, simple, gentle, powerful, sustainable.
The Agape Bloom is not about fixing what you believe is broken. It is about remembering the truth: you were never broken at all. You may feel broken. I know I did. Beneath the noise, your natural state has always been peace, clarity, and love.
Like the sunflower planted in the harshest soil, you were designed to rise, to turn toward light, to bloom.
A Gentle Invitation
This is your journey. There are no rigid steps, no rules. Trust that you will be drawn to what you need, when you need it. If something resonates, stay with it. If it does not, let it go.
You are not alone. We walk together in this — discovering that the inflamed sufferer can heal, the over-giver can find balance, the burned-out soul can come home to peace.
So let us begin. With curiosity. With honesty. With simplicity.
You are precious.
You deserve the freedom this understanding brings.
New possibility, peace, and love in abundance await you.
Agape,
Leeanne Meikle
